Early this morning, a shocking scene unfolded at Pork's Popsicles in New Brunswick. Known as a beloved local business owner, John Pork met an untimely and tragic end in what witnesses describe as a bizarre, almost surreal encounter. The incident, which left John dead and raised more questions than answers, has captivated both locals and investigators alike.

Ambushed Outside His Own Store

It all began late last night as John Pork was closing his popular ice cream shop for the night. According to security footage and witness reports, John was preparing to lock up when he was ambushed by a tall man, reportedly around six feet in height, with unusual characteristics. Eyewitnesses describe the suspect as having brown fur, an unusually plump belly, long arms, and distinctive round ears. Witnesses further noted the assailant smelled strongly of bananas. This strange description led some to speculate that the attacker might be more than just an ordinary human, though officials have yet to comment on this angle.

“He just appeared out of nowhere,” said Daniella Donkey, a passerby who witnessed the beginning of the incident from across the street. “One minute John was locking up, and the next there was this… creature… lurching towards him. I thought it was some kind of prank at first, but then I saw the blood and realized it was something far worse.”

Coworker Discovers the Tragedy

At the time of the attack, Marvin Beak, one of John’s longtime coworkers, was in the bathroom. He exited shortly after hearing the commotion and found John lying on the ground, unresponsive, as the attacker fled the scene. Marvin recalls seeing another figure with the attacker, described as “plump, white with black spots, and hooves bound by rope.” This second individual, whom Marvin described as “frightened but strangely calm,” was hurried along by the brown-furred assailant as they escaped with two jugs of vanilla and chocolate ice cream.

“I couldn’t believe my eyes,” Marvin recounted in an interview. “There was John, lifeless on the ground, and these two figures, one running and the other sort of stumbling, making their getaway with our ice cream. It didn’t make any sense – I mean, who would kill over a couple jugs of ice cream?”

Link to Recent Zoo Disappearances?

Adding to the mystery, authorities noted that the suspects were last seen near Thompson Park Zoo Grove 4A in Monroe Township, roughly 15 miles from the crime scene. This detail has led to speculation that the incident may be connected to recent, puzzling disappearances at the zoo. Just last week, the zoo reported that its entire pen of cows had vanished without a trace, and the monkey enclosure, typically home to a large, banana-loving primate, was found empty the following morning. The last confirmed sighting of the monkey was near the cow pen, though how both enclosures ended up empty remains unknown.

While the zoo has not commented on the specifics of the missing animals, locals are already drawing connections. “It can’t just be a coincidence,” said Henry Horse, a regular at John’s ice cream parlor. “Everyone around here knows about the zoo animals that disappeared. I’m telling you, it was those animals. They must have gotten loose and were trying to survive.”

An Ongoing Investigation

As of now, police have not confirmed any connection between the suspects and the escaped zoo animals, though they acknowledge the unusual descriptions provided by witnesses. “We’re investigating all leads at this point,” said Officer Linda Lizard of the New Brunswick Police Department. “While the descriptions given are… unique, we have no reason to rule anything out. Our priority is to ensure public safety and bring justice to Mr. Pork’s family and friends.”

The police have also been reviewing nearby surveillance footage, and while they have not yet released any images of the suspects, sources close to the investigation suggest that officers are taking the animal connection seriously. Additional officers were seen entering the Thompson Park Zoo Grove 4A earlier today, and reports indicate they are searching for evidence that might link the animals to the scene of the crime.

Community Reactions

News of John Pork’s death has left the local community in shock. Known for his warm personality and humorous social media posts, John was widely regarded as a beloved figure. His ice cream parlor was a fixture in the neighborhood, and many are mourning the loss of someone they viewed as a friend.

“I’ve known John for years,” said Marcy Mouse, a resident who lives near the shop. “He was more than just an ice cream guy – he was the heart of this town. And now, to think that he died in such a terrible, strange way… it’s just heartbreaking.”

Vigils have already been planned for the coming days, and flowers have been left outside the ice cream parlor, turning the usually cheerful location into a somber memorial.

Police Urge the Public to Remain Vigilant

As the investigation continues, authorities are urging locals to be on the lookout for any unusual sightings or behavior near Thompson Park Zoo or surrounding areas. They have also advised residents not to approach anyone matching the suspects’ descriptions, especially near wooded or isolated areas, and to report any suspicious activity immediately.

The tragic death of John Pork has left the town of New Brunswick reeling, and as the investigation unfolds, residents are hoping for answers to what has become one of the most puzzling and unsettling crimes in recent memory.